One thing is for sure, life throws curveballs. This is where Stoicism shines with a no-nonsense approach to navigating the chaos that encompasses our daily lives. Stoicism isn’t about sitting on a rock contemplating life and its many mysteries; it’s about handling life’s ups and downs with grace, grit, with a big dose of humor.

Here’s how to weave Stoic principles into your everyday life, and maybe become the calmest, most level-headed person in every room.

Live According to Nature

When the Stoics said to “live according to nature,” they weren’t suggesting you skip off into the woods to hug trees. They meant aligning your actions with human nature: being social, rational, and maybe not losing your cool when at the many detours life throws us.

In practical terms, this might involve:

  • Prioritize your people. Take time to nurture relationships with family and friends. These connections are where we thrive.
  • Think before you act. Use reason to guide your decisions instead of letting your emotions run the show.

For instance, if you find yourself in a heated argument, pause and ask: “Am I seeking resolution or just venting my frustration?” The rational path is to focus on constructive dialogue that strengthens the relationship rather than causing harm.

Practice Virtue

Stoicism emphasizes four core virtues: practical wisdom, courage, justice, and temperance. Each of these can guide our behavior in daily life:

  • Practical Wisdom: Know what’s good for you and what’s not (hint: wisdom says skip the third donut).
  • Courage: Do what’s right, even when it’s hard.
  • Justice: Treat people fairly. Yes, even the coworker who “borrows” your stapler.
  • Temperance: Find balance. Don’t overdo it or underdo it.

Example: At work, you’re torn between standing up for a colleague or staying quiet to avoid drama. Justice says advocate for them. Courage helps you follow through. Temperance keeps you from turning the office into a toxic work environment.

Master the Dichotomy of Control – Don’t Herd Cats

One of the most transformative Stoic ideas is the dichotomy of control: some things are within your power, while others are not. Epictetus, a former slave turned philosopher, highlighted this distinction:

  • Within your control: Your thoughts, actions, and effort.
  • Out of your control: Everything else, including the weather, other people’s opinions, and whether your sourdough starter ever rises.

By focusing only on what you can control, you free yourself from unnecessary anxiety. For instance, when preparing for a job interview, concentrate on crafting a strong resume and practicing your responses (within your control). Whether or not you get the job depends on factors beyond your influence, such as the interviewer’s preferences. By detaching from the outcome, you reduce stress and focus on doing your best.

Reframe Challenges as Opportunities

The Stoics didn’t just endure hard times, they thrived in them. Marcus Aurelius famously said, “What stands in the way becomes the way.” Translation: Life isn’t out to get you; it’s just a weirdly tough gym trainer.

When a setback comes our way instead of stewing, ask, “What can I learn from this?” You have a delayed project, spend the time refining your approach. You get injured in the gym or the jiujitsu, focus on recovery and skills you can improve while you heal. Every obstacle is a chance to build your resilience muscle.

Internalize Your Goals

The Stoics believed in aiming for effort, not outcomes. Think of yourself as an archer: your job is to perfect your aim, technique, and focus. Whether the arrow hits the bullseye, that’s out of your hands.

This principle can reshape your approach to fitness, career aspirations, or relationships. Instead of obsessing over weight loss, focus on maintaining a consistent workout routine and getting your steps in. Success lies in your commitment, not in external results.

Play Your Roles with Integrity

According to Stoicism, life is like a play, and we all have roles to perform, parent, friend, colleagues and acquaintances. The key is to play these roles to the best of your ability while balancing their demands.

For example, being a good dad might mean setting aside work to coach your son’s flag football team. Recognize that roles come with trade-offs and our goal is strive for balance – the Stoic virtues of practical wisdom and temperance are our north star.

Find Your Mentors

The Stoics loved role models. Figures like Marcus Aurelius or Seneca can shine light on how their work can inspire action, even in the most challenging circumstances.

Even Marvel characters like Spider-Man, can serve as role models. His mantra, “With great power comes great responsibility,” aligns perfectly with Stoic teachings about exercising the power of choice responsibly.

Reflect Daily

At the end of each day, take a moment to ask yourself:

  • Did I live by my values?
  • Did I practice wisdom, courage, justice, and temperance?
  • What can I do better tomorrow?

Think of it as a mental workout, consistent reps build stronger character. Plus, it’s a great way to wind down before bed.

Live in the Moment

A Stoics lives in the present. Epictetus said, “If it is now, well, then I die now. If later, then now I will take my lunch.” In other words, don’t waste time obsessing over the inevitable. Focus on what’s in front of you, whatever that could be.

Incorporating Stoicism into everyday life can be as simple as being present in your day and living by the four virtues. By focusing on what’s within your control, practicing the virtues, and viewing challenges as opportunities, you can navigate life’s ups and downs with greater clarity and purpose.

Keep Moving the Dirt

Stoicism isn’t about achieving perfection, it’s about progress. It’s the philosophy of “move the dirt,” – some days, you get a shovel. Other days, you get a spoon. Either way, you’re moving it each day.

By focusing on what’s in your control, practicing the virtues, and turning challenges into growth opportunities, you can handle life’s chaos with resilience, clarity, and purpose. So, grab your shovel and get to work.